Sexual Frequency
Rates of intercourse appear to have increased among married couples in recent decades. For example, pioneering sex researcher Alfred Kinsey and his colleagues (Kinsey et al. 1953) surveyed over eleven thousand men and women living in the United States during the late 1940s and early 1950s about a variety of sexual issues, including how often they had sex. The results of these large-scale surveys revealed that young married couples tended to have sex approximately twice weekly. Twenty years later, in 1974, social scientist Morton Hunt reported slightly higher frequencies—on average, young married men and women (ranging in age from eighteen to twenty-four) had sex 3.25 times a week. This seeming rise in sexual frequency may stem from a variety of social changes occurring in the 1960s and 1970s that liberalized marital sexuality, including the advent of sex therapy, the "sexual revolution," the increased availability of erotic or pornographic material, and the introduction of the birth control pill.
More recent data, however, suggest that the amount of sexual activity between spouses has not continued to rise. According to a U.S. national study headed by sociologists Edward Laumann and John Gagnon (Laumann et al. 1994), most married couples have sex an average of seven times a month (this amounts to less than twice a week). Only 7 percent, in fact, of the married respondents in their study reported having sex four or more times each week. Other U.S. national surveys of married couples in the 1990s provided similar results (Call, Sprecher, and Schwartz 1995; Donnelly 1993). In addition, there is tremendous variability in the frequency of sexual intercourse in marital relationships. Some couples are celibate or have sex very infrequently, whereas others engage in intercourse on a daily basis. For example, Cathy Greenblat (1983) interviewed eighty people who had been married five years or less. The number of times spouses reported having had sexual intercourse each month during their first year of marriage ranged from one (or an average of twelve times that year) to forty-five (or 540 times that first year).
Several researchers have explored whether certain long-term couple types have sex more frequently than others. In general, surveys reveal that cohabitation is a "sexier" living arrangement than is marriage. That is, cohabiting heterosexual couples and homosexual male couples tend to have sexual intercourse (defined as genital contact) more frequently than married couples (Blumstein and Schwartz 1983; Call, Sprecher, and Schwartz 1995; Rao and DeMaris 1995). Homosexual female (lesbian) couples, on the other hand, have sex less frequently than other couple types, although they engage in more nongenital physical contact (e.g., cuddling, hugging). Despite these differences, all forms of long-term, committed partnership—married or cohabiting, heterosexual or homosexual—are associated with greater sexual frequency than is singlehood (Laumann et al. 1994).
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23 days ago
Im a 34 year old married man, who always enjoyed regular sexual activity before I met my wife. I enjoyed everything about sex. I am now lucky if I have sex once every three months. I feel empty and unfulfilled and I have been married for 5 years. I love my wife very much but now find my self beginning resent her. I train at the gym 6 times a week and have even gone to the extremes of taking steroids to achieve a 'perfect' body as I thought it might be me that was becoming unattractive. I still feel my wife is very sexy and attractive and have told her so every day since we have been married.
about 1 month ago
How about a woman's point of view? I am 33 & husband is 36, we've been married almost 10 years. We have sex an average of 4x/wk, depending on illness and the level of exhaustion from the kids, which we have 2 of, one of which is special needs. I agree that some of this frequency is due to chemistry but I would also suggest that the way my husband treats me makes me desire him sexually. He truly cherishes me, offering massages at least twice a week, bringing me a glass of tea or juice when I'm getting ready for bed. He compliments me and tells me how beautiful I am everyday! He loves me, and since I feel loved, I feel more sexual toward him. (and Sean, we BOTH go without when he is deployed, and we try very hard to be open and connect emotionally so we aren't as sexually frustrated)
about 1 month ago
I am a 28 year old female ( canadian). I am single, but when i am in a realtionship i would like to have sex every day. Its awesome and i love the physical and emotional connection. I have been told this is rare, that most couples do it about 2x a week. This is unthinkable to me......I hope to be married to a man one day that is just as passionate about this important intimate expression. Help! Is my idea of love impossible?
2 months ago
I am a 53 year old male, my partner is 59. We have sex every night, sometimes in the morning and sometimes in the afternoon. I put this down to as having the right chemistry.
4 months ago
it must be nice, i go so long without it that when i do get it it isnt very long, i average about 20-30 times a year when im home and 0 a year when im in iraq, this is from a guy who use to get it everyday, the thought of cheating on her runs throughout my mind about 4 times an hour
11 months ago
I am over 40 year old... I can have sex at least 4-5 times/per week. If my spouse can keep up with me; then I could have sex everyday!!! Eventhough, I do not have enough sleep, I still keep up with my sex routine just fine... My sex routine has been going on for couple of years already and continue to present. Now, my question! is it too much sex/per week??? I would like to have any your comment? Thanks.